Report Card Season. YAY!!!!! Well, this is the season when report cards are being distributed to grade school students. For some families this is an exciting time, however for other families, it’s not so pleasant.
When my children were young, receiving their report card meant receiving money. They were reward based on the grade they received. Each A earned $5, B’s were awarded $3 but C’s, D’s and F’s were not acceptable (which my children didn’t receive Ds and Fs). Nonetheless, money was deducted for and Cs or occasional D they received. I must say; I didn't have much trouble with my children receiving fairly good report cards. In cases when they would receive a C, it was because they were either struggling with a particular lesson or they were not putting in the effort. If they struggled excessively in a class but did their very best, I gave them grace for that class because;
A hard earned C is worth praising
At this point, I knew there was something I needed to do as a mom. Either I needed to enroll my child in tutoring, re-evaluate our schedule or it was time for natural consequences in order to encourage them to be more focused.
When children receive good grades, accolades and awards, it boosts their confidence and self-esteem. With increased levels of confidence come decreased levels of defiant behavior. On the other hand, when children occasionally receive a low grade, it’s an opportunity for them to learn how to be more humble, strategize and show more appreciation.
As a Mommy Coach and Owner/Operator of a Child Development Center, I witness children of all grade levels; either receive exceptionally high scores, average scores or receive exceptionally low scores. The most disappointing part is when I see mom’s who have mentally checked out because of the pressure it takes to help their child to succeed. A 4th grade student once told me that her mother didn’t want to see her report card, but instead instructed her to get ready for bed because she has school tomorrow. Although the child didn’t do very well, she was eager to show her report card to her mom.
Here are a few steps to take when your child is struggling with their academics and you feel overwhelmed and discouraged:
- Self Care –Do something for yourself EACH DAY that will allow you to feel rested and accomplished
- Stay encouraged and energized so you can undertake the daily chores of life and the responsibilities that come with parenting
- Have a pleasant, non-judgmental conversation with your child about what they are feeling and what you can do to help
- Work with a Coach to help you determine ways you can help your child succeed
- Ask yourself if your own disappointment is causing your child to feel miserable or rejected due to the absence of recognition
- Never make your child feel like a failure
- Get help for your child before it's too late